I'm so glad! Where it gets really interesting for me is when you start talking about shadow aspects -- ie, negative qualities that this person has, that you may not like, but that you might crave.

For instance, I've recognized a pattern of being attracted to folks who seem to just not give a fuck about what people think about them! This means that they can come off as brusque, rude, or even mean... not qualities I want in myself.

BUT, for me as a people pleaser who's always concerned what people think of me, I can recognize that I actually need to care less about what others think of me... and sometimes spending time with folks who are grumpy is a round-about way to try to get more "caring less" in my life. I can cut out the middle man by just working on that quality more in myself.

I might not be explaining it well, but this video really helped me understand some things: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWDRC3fno4c